There's this sick and sickening way in which the scenario certain trans activists have been waiting for—the situation they created the mental conditions for—has finally happened and now they can run around with a body and point at it.
It's validating, right? It's a jolt of reassurance for organizations like Mermaids after months of fierce pushback: we must be in the right. Look what happens when this movement is criticized! Look how urgent it is!
And how irresponsible, how forgetful of the child at the center, how forgetful of children in general: what we know about what children need and how children grow and change over time, what we know about preventing suicide—which includes communicating responsibly about suicide when a young person takes his or her life.
What the hell happened to "It gets better"? That promise of growth and resilience and change—extended from older members of the community to younger ones—probably saved more than a few lives.
Trans activist organizations—who know better—take a different tack. These organizations and many prominent trans activists wildly exaggerate the risk of violence. They equate asking questions and expressing concerns with harboring hatred and bigotry. They encourage young people to believe that family and friends who don’t share their beliefs about gender don’t love them, can’t be trusted, and even suggest that such loved ones don’t care if they live or die. And when it comes to suicide, trans activism too often plants the idea that suicide is a reasonable response to common circumstances young trans-identified people face. They nurture this idea, validate it, valorize it, and weaponize it against political opponents.
No healthy, open, supportive community seeks to terrify and control its young members like this. A healthy trans movement would foster resilience and self-sufficiency in trans-identifying youth, rather than telling kids that anyone who disagrees with their worldview hates them or that exposure to "misgendering" can lead to suicide.
I wish trans activists would say: You won't always feel the way you feel right now. There are a lot of ways to make a life you can live with. You don't have to decide how to deal with your feelings right now. People can disagree and still love one another. It gets better.
I share your sincere hope.
But the line that you wish them to say ("You won't always feel the way you feel right now") is unlikely to be forthcoming any time soon, sadly.
It would be a rejection of their core belief that a trans person's inner gender identity is immutable and will never change.
That's why they will never say that, and why they cannot possibly give any credence or airtime to detransitioners.
So much for instilling a sense of resiliency.